March 23, 2010

AHhhhhhhh, the sweet feeling of definition.....yesss...!

The last few weeks have been testing my patience.  I started training for the Pan Ams in January.   Full speed ahead.  Take no prisoners.  Sometime about the end of January, beginning of February, I learned that my job would be starting a promotion process for a lucrative position I have been working toward for several years.  The written exam was to be held at the end of February, and the interviews were tentatively scheduled for, guess what, April 8-10.

I put BJJ on hold for two weeks while I hit the books each night, each weekend, and pretty much every waking moment to study for written test.  Passing this test was required to obtain an interview in April.  So I read and read and read and read some more until my eyes bled paper and ink.  Nearly drove myself batty from not getting my usual dose of vigorous, rip roaring movement.  

After the completion of the written test I felt good,  the studying had most certainly paid off, but the proctors told us the test results would be mailed in four weeks.  FOUR WEEKS?!  What the hell?  It's a damn scantron!  Run it through the machine and let's move on!  Ahhhh, but no grasshopper. Patience.  four weeks.  

We were allowed to go to human resources and examine our scores, so I knew right away I most likely made the interview cut, but I work for the city; so until you get the official word, anything can happen.   

Needless to say, between training, the promotion announcement, training on back seat, training again on front seat, waiting for results of the test,  injuring my groin, thus training on hold for one week,  all the while not knowing the answer to the question, "Are you doing the Pan Ams?"  Auntie Em it's a twister!  I enjoy the process of splitting my focus and attempting to truly excel in many arenas,  but I have been aching for just a hint of definition and sharpness on the horizon.  I have been trying my best to welcome the uncertainty, rejoice in the unknown, and be calm and centered and find the wisdom.....easier said than done.  The lessons of martial arts are simple to read, but putting them into practice is a slow, ongoing, movement.  

So today I have answer.  The weight is lifted!  I received a letter from the city stating my interview will be on Friday April 9th, in the morning.  I will face three separate interview panels over the course of two hours.  

My clarity has returned.  My focus will shift slightly in the next couple of weeks.  I will concentrate  on preparing for this interview, and I'll downshift BJJ to 2-3 days per week, instead of 3-4, plus yoga and weights.   The competition will be stiff, as there are a ton of incredibly qualified candidates and a precious few open positions.  

This post is little off topic, but my class today was like a soggy paper towel and I was extremely happy to receive this bit of good news after getting whooped.    But, as I write this, I realize, maybe this is not so off-topic, as many of you probably face similar conundrums when work time and off work time priorities collide.  I am fortunate to love my job, so the promotion process is a momentary necessary lapse in the fun, but well worth my attention.  BJJ is more than a "hobby," so my work outs are more than a run of the mill jaunt.  And getting ready for a tournament means that every roll, every lift of the kettel bell, every yoga stretch has a purpose.  I constantly ask myself, am I training enough?  Am I maximizing my time?   And so the training continues.  The envelope gets pushed.  The next level beckons.